Words...and Their Impact.

Today has not been good. It's about 11:21 PM and I'm up watching an encore presentation of The Voice (which is very good btw) and reflecting on the events of this week. In the last few days, I've seen quite a few things just fall apart. Then today, I received a reminder from someone who I thought was close to me and supportive of me, well, I'm starting to see them in a different light. Maybe they were playing, maybe they weren't but it really hurt my feelings. This certain person, I thought had my back and was supportive of all my little side things, my hobbies, my passions, and my joys. Turns out that I may be wrong, and it just hurts I guess. Sometimes, we turn the other cheek, laugh it off like we don't care, yet as we turn and walk away we do our best to hide the sting and to control the vibrations it just set off. Sometimes, it's harder to shake off than others, sometimes it's harder to conceal than other times, so how do we deal?

Why do we automatically try to charge it off like it doesn't hurt? Why do we act as if we don't care? Is it "uncool" if we show our true feelings? Even when one of our deepest, most prized possession has been brutally sideswept? What is this bravado that we carry? Is it wrong to be vulnerable? I'm sitting here thinking, "if one of my friends came to me and told me this happened to them, what would I say to them" I know exactly what I'd say. It goes along something like this: "Screw him/her! They don't know what they're talking about; ignore the haters" or "Don't let it get to you; you can't always please everyone and not everyone will like what you have to offer, but as long as you enjoy it, keep doing what you're doing". Why is it always easier to give someone the advice but when it comes to ourselves, it's much harder to do?

Sometimes when friends come to us, we say what we are supposed to say and make sure it's not anything negative, but are we really being a friend by doing that? But if we state the truth and it's not what the person wants to hear, are we then being insensitive? I personally believe in right place, right time. If one of your best girlfriends is crying to you because she got into a fight with her boyfriend, and you think the guy is a douchebag, do you really think that situation is the best time to say something like, "Well, what do you expect? He's a douche!" Maybe instead, we should try something a little softer yet still be honest. How about something like "I'm sorry that you're going through this. He hasn't treated you in the way that you should be." This way, number one, you're not insulting their other half, and number two, you show concern for your friend.

There's so much hurt in this world these days; sometimes it's intentional and most of the time, it is not. However, in the work world, it never matters how one "meant" for it to come across; in the court of law, all that matters is how the comment made the other person(s) feel. Maybe this is something that we should apply in our own lives. I am not perfect, I am not a savior, I am not the best person, but I try my best. Sometimes, I am too honest; most of the time, I don't realize how honest I was until later and even then, much much later. I've never intended to hurt anyone as I'm sure that some of the comments directed towards me may have been unintentional as well.

So what's the point of this rant? Well, it made me realize how hurt I was over a comment that was made to me and how for so long, I've shrugged it off and acted like I don't care but it really hurt inside and finally expressing that hurt to the person today. Also, while writing this, I also realized how we treat each other and how much of an impact our words can have on each other.